JizzleJazzle's Horoscope April 29 - May 5, 2011

April 29, 2011NewsComments145 Views

Feeling overwhelmed?  Confused?  Tired?  Constipated?  Oh yeah, this is your week.


Aries, Leo and Sagittarius:

You're gonna feel overwhelmed with responsibilities this week so try your best not to fall asleep at the wheel.  Although if you do just blame it on Jesus and say he took the wheel.


Capricorn, Taurus and Virgo:

You're spending a lot of time in your head this week trying to get clarity.  Just don't forget that there are others who need your brain too.  Uhm, pun intended?

Libra, Aquarius and Gemini:

You feel the need to reflect and recharge your batteries this week.  Don't forget your little secret toy in your pleasure chest also needs new batteries.

Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces:

Your ability to communicate this week is impaired not by terrible AT&T iPhone reception but more so by your fear in being honest. That's why you feel trapped and held back like a piece of stink up Whitney Houston's butt.  Maybe Bobby Brown can help ya out.


I'm JizzleJazzle and remember don't be good, be fabulous.


April 29, 2011NewsComments145 Views